Hi Jenni
No wonder you are under a mountain of paperwork. We had to do statements for my middle daughter and I used to be a parent support person to help other people get statements!!! Winchester used to have a Parent Partnership scheme which would provide someone to help - not sure if it is still running but it may be on the website. I sympathise - it is very hard work.
I don't think you can do it privately as it is an LEA thing. At one time I was on the advisory committee for Hampshire CC for visually impaired children. One thing about the statements etc that I learned from the inside is that although a Statement is meant to be a 'statement of Educational need' the reality is that they a budget driven, so you often don't get what you want because of money. This is not how they should be and you can remind the department that it is on the educational need not the departments budget!! One of my friends managed to get out of county provision by keeping on badging them non-stop. She had to go to appeal as well and explain why is was important. I gather Gem is in the place you want her to stay in.
As a parent you used to be able to write and ask for a statement of educational needs. If you asked they HAD to assess for one (not actually do one - but they usually did). Also the educational establishment they are in can ask for an assessment (again they used to be obliged to look into it). You would need to send off lots of evidence with your letter which it sounds like you are doing. The first statement we had for our daughter was instigated by her prospective infant school head and was done in 4 months!! She wouldn't take her without a statement in place, and was good at chasing up the LEA.
1. keep going with all the forms and getting them in (esp for Gem as she's still under 16)
2. phone once a week to ask how they are getting on (as you keep phoning your paperwork keeps getting put to the top of the pile and in the end they get on with it quicker to shut you up!!) .... this worked quite well for us. But it is tedious and stressful doing it.. but worth it. Remind them it should be educational driven not money driven.
3. Go to appeal if necessary (which is often is) and watch out carefully for all the dates so you dont miss them.
4. if you've got a good educational psychologist who agrees with what you are wanting, ask them nicely to phone and chivvy things along as well once all the documents and evidence are in. If a statement is agreed, they would have to do a comprehensive report anyway.
5. Does one of the support groups for Gem have an statementing advisor who could help you? I know the RNIB and Look (which is for blind and the visually impaired do - which we used in the passed). They know all the ropes!
6. Any meetings - take someone with you for support for yourself - someone who knows all the details.
For Michael, it is a rather different system when they get to college age and it comes under a different department, and I'm not sure how the system works there, but it is more based on the college they go to. And they have to set up all the help. Some colleges have a special department that will help with all the form filling and providing the extra support. I know certain colleges in the area specialise in different 'disorders' eg for the blind, there are only 2 places in hampshire that cater for them... but they do provide free transport as a result.
My experience is with visually impaired children. Dont most people end up going to appeal, that's normal so don't worry about that.
Remember you can only try. Don't feel bad, you are doing your best for them both. Make the phone calls in the mornings, when you are probably at your best, and the LEA workers are usually in a better mood!!
I don't know about getting adoption details, that's not my experience but someone else on here may know about that.
I'll send you a private message on facebook with my home telephone number. I go away next Friday for a week but am around until then (well in and out!!).
Have a big hug
Anne xxx
(haven't checked this for spellings but I hope you get the general sense!!)
